How to Help Your Kids Understand Time and Plan Ahead

"I'll be off the phone in two minutes," you tell your four-year-old. Before you've even turned around, he asks, "Has it been two minutes yet?"

While the passage of time feels subjective to all of us, it's especially baffling to young children. They don't yet have the skill of estimating how long activities will take. And they're only beginning to come into contact with the devices we grown-ups use to track time. (Did I really just spend an hour and 45 minutes on the computer?)

Here are some ways to help your kids become more patient, handle long waits, and prepare for the next activity.

Make time visible. Turn time into something kids can see. A timer or clock will help. "When the big hand is on five . . . " or "as soon as the digital clock says 2:30 . . . " makes time more concrete. For longer waits, create a chart to mark off hours—or post a calendar and mark off days.

Be specific. Kids need familiar points of reference regarding time. For instance, you can say, "Dinner will be ready in the time it takes to tell three riddles and sing a song" or "Grandma will visit after your nap." Introduce kids to the sequences of time: the hours of the day, days of the week, and months of the year. Truly mastering these time references takes years.

To make time fly, have fun! Time passes more quickly when kids are happily occupied. Bring their books, activities, and games along when you know you and your kids will be waiting. Word games, storytelling, and conversation are other great ways of making time pass quickly.

Try not to rush! Don't try to fit 10 minutes of frantic activity into a five-minute time slot. Help your kids develop a realistic sense of how much time is needed for different tasks. If they seem to be unaware, encourage older kids to jot down what they have to do and estimate how much time is needed.

Refer to the past. Talking about the past ("When you were a baby . . . ") gives kids a sense of continuity. Looking at family albums ("This is Daddy when he was your age!") makes "once upon a time" less abstract. The past includes everything from yesterday's soccer game to dinosaurs.

Create manageable waits. While some kids like surprises, most do better if they have some advance notice. It's important to prepare your kids for a move, a new sibling, or a change in schools. However, since their sense of time is still forming, give young children just enough time to ask questions and get used to the idea, but not so much that they'll become confused or anxious.

Help them plan. Kids are not famous for their planning skills. Help them anticipate what's next and decide how to get ready. If they're old enough, use appointment books or digital planners. Show them how you plan, and talk about steps involved in your planning process.

Remember, it's just a matter of time until kids become more time-conscious. And while you wait for that, know that one of the joys of childhood is the capacity to enjoy the way time simply flows.